How Indians Show Bias Against a Girl
A lot has been talked about gender discrimination on broader issues like female infanticide, dowry, right to education etc, but not much light has been shed on the daily discrimination that women face in their daily lives of all ages. Below I’ve discussed the smaller issues that need to be addressed.
If you grew up with a brother, elder or younger must have experienced biases at the hands of your parents. “Bhaiya scooter se tumhe coaching chor dega aur late mat Karna warna bhaiya ko wait Karna padega” or something like this is a familiar dialogue that most of the girls’ must’ve heard in the name of safety. Why not give your daughter a scooter and a good lesson on safety so she can independently pursue her day.
We know most of you are blessed with this privilege and some at a very young age but there are still many who can just dream of a basic amenity like a scooter only. Every girl must feel the sense of liberation by being mobile, but till now the “lallas and the Raja betas” of the house are treated like superiors.
A few years forward, for higher education, so many girls are deprived of higher studies, especially in smaller towns or cities where high-quality education is lacking. Forget high quality, basic graduation is snatched away, why? Because ultimately they have to get married so what’s the point? The point is whether married or not every girl is entitled to financial independence just like the men; all humans are for that matter, and it can only be achieved with a good education.
The most heartbreaking situation comes when parents from small-town send their sons out for better quality education and not their daughters, again in the name of safety they want to shield their daughters from all the big bad world, in that big bad world there is a lot of goodness hidden waiting for her to absorb it. Depriving her of the education she deserves is not the solution, teaching her the right and wrong and boosting her confidence is the key to prepare her.
So many families have a conservative mind when it comes to marriage and girls. After marriage, she is faced with so many biases. Some families till now prefer a non-working daughter-in-law. Before marriage a girl was kept under the shelter of her father and after marriage she is repressed by her husband, obviously this is rarely seen in the bigger cities yet some educated men are still threatened by successful women, for them we would suggest visit a therapist and get rid of all your insecurities and start treating your wife with more dignity and respect.
Society cannot handle a woman with a successful career, is our patriarchal society. It’s okay to give up on your career as long as it’s your decision, but it shouldn’t be forced.
Coming to motherhood, it’s so common to hear kids referring to their mothers as “Tum” and fathers as “Aap”, why?? Also how many times have you gone to your mother to take permission for some and she replies by saying, “Go ask your dad.” Really? What happened to co-parenting? Why are women being suppressed even as mothers?
So just because the father is the earning member of the family therefore only he has the right to make solo decisions for the kids, while mothers are just there to pack tiffin boxes? Every mother has a right to make the decision for her child whether earning or not, there can be disagreements, which can be sorted out like mature adults keeping what’s best for the child in mind.
Broader issues are being tackled at international level but the ground level issues are equally important and need to be resolved.